No! No!
Verne, you all right there?
- Gimme a hand, Oz. - Sure, sure.
- What happened? - What happened?
It's gone. The food! Gone!
- What? - Gone?
- How's it gone? - Ask him!
- Verne? - I returned it
- to its rightful owner. - What?
We, like, worked our tails off, you know?
Like, a lot. And the food we gathered was totally...
You know. And you're... You're all, whatever.
Yeah, Verne, what were you thinking? The log was full!
- Full of junk. - So, what are you saying there?
That the food we gather our way isn't as good as the food we gather your way?
Your way? You mean his way.
Can't you see RJ is just using you?
Verne! Shame on you. RJ wouldn't do that.
You have got to trust me on this. Don't you understand
there's something wrong with him?
My tail tingles every time I get near him.
So we're supposed to go hungry because your butt's vibrating?
I'm starting to think that tingle is just you being jealous.
- Jealous? Of him? - Yeah.
He's embracing the future there, and you're just holding us back.
I hold you back, all right. From extinction.
See what you've done here?
If they listened to half the stuff you're telling them,
they'll be dead within a week. You are only interested in taking advantage
because they're too stupid and naive to know any better.
I'm not stupid.
OK, I didn't mean...
I meant ignorant.
To the ways over... over there.
Come on, you guys. You know I didn't mean it like that.
Don't... don't do this.
Stella? Ozzie?
Hammy? You know I didn't...
- Hammy... - I'm not stupid.
Please.
- Good night, Uncle RJ. - Good night, kiddo.
Moon's full, RJ. See ya in the morning.
This'll cut you down to size!
I got ya!
- Is it done? - Affirmative.
Did you put this one in? This Depelter Turbo?
That's a contraband item, ma'am, as it is illegal in every state, except Texas.
I don't care if it's against the Geneva Convention.
- I want it! - I thought you might.
So I took the liberty of installing it for you.
Adios, animal infestation.
Oh, my.
What have I done?
- Shouldn't have taken all that food. - What?
I shouldn't have taken all that food.
I was just trying to return things to the way they were.
I was just being cautious. 'Cause that's what I am.
I'm naturally tentative.
There's even places in my shell I haven't been.
You, on the other hand, you're like... cool.
And crazy and fearless.
I think they're right. I think I'm just jealous.
Verne, believe me, you should not be jealous of me.
You got a good thing here. You're trying to do what's best for your family.
And I think you're what's best for them now.
What about your tail?
My head says listen to my tail, my tail says listen to my head, and I just...
...end up with an upset stomach.
That's why you need to be in charge now.
- You don't know what's going on. - And you do.
- So, what's the problem? - This, Verne, is the problem.
- You see this? - I'm listening.
Just...
Just hang on a second. All right?
I...
- You throwing the party? - Yes. To the right.
There are protective booties to put on over your shoes.
Yes! Yes!
- What is this? - What?
Oh, that...
... is a...
... Iist of all the stuff that you lost, Verne.
- Really? - It's a big, long list. You can see.
You're a... organized little guy, aren't you? Nice job.
You know what? I know a place so chock-full of food,
we could get it all back in one night.
Great. Let's go. Where is it?
- lnside that house. - What?
- What is the point of this thing? - Just send it down.
What Verne is trying to say is...
I mean, it's hard to really sum it all up in just one word.
- But... - I'm sorry.
Oh, come here.
- Oh, come here, Verne. - That's right.
OK! Listen, stay in the huddle. Here's the plan.
Now, the traps are set here, here, here,
here, here, here, here, here, here,
here, here, here and here.
Here, here, here, here.
Big one here, here,
- and maybe a few over here. - Gee, is that all?
No. There's a bunch of red lights all over here.
OK, Verne? Looking a little green.
I blacked out for a second there, but I get the idea.
There's lights, traps... I might need to change my shell.
OK, this is us.
- Can I be the car? - I wanna be the car!
- I'm the car. You be the shoe. - The shoe is lame.
Why don't you be that snazzy-looking iron?
Hey, it's not important!
Besides, I'm the car. I'm always the car.
The plan works in three simple steps. Step one, kill the lights.
Step two, get inside. Step three, get out with mountain of food.
But this place is like a fortress. Walls, so high. Doors, impenetrable.
- How will we get in? - The collar is the key.
Literally, the collar.
It's like a key that opens the door and if...
And what? You think he's just gonna hand over his collar to you?
Not to me, my femme fatale. To you.
- Her? - Me?
You, Stella, will get that cat to give you his collar by using...
- My stink. -...your feminine charms.
Was that out loud?
Look, raccoon, maybe that mask you're wearing is obstructing your view,
but if you haven't noticed, I'm a skunk.
On the outside, maybe. But I'm looking inside, Stella, and I see a fox.
And all we gotta do is get her out.
- Scissors. - Scissors?
- Here we go. - Watch the...
- Charcoal. - Charcoal?
- Air freshener. - Tomato juice.
- Cork. - Cork? Don't you dare.
- Get 'em! - Score! Yeah!
One more thing.
Stop. That's it.
Ladies and gentlemen, our work here is done.
Oh, my.
- Big jeepers. - She's all like, wow.
What?
Meow.
- Whoa! - Amazing!
Gosh, she looks...
Wow.
All right, gang, this is it. We're going in.
Not again. Dang it! Those things are so lifelike.
Curse you, plastic moldsman.
OK, Hammy.
Hammy!
Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
Hammy, I told you that cookie's junk!
But I like a cookie.
What's going on? Is everything OK?
Here we go!
Come on, Hammy, come on. Follow the pretty light. There it is, that's it.
That's it, that's it.
There it is. Go get it.
That's it, that's it.
Go get it, you little nut!
Bingo! OK, step two.
I thought we'd be dead by step two, so this is going great!
OK, gorgeous, you're on.
Man, this better be one stupid cat.
Audio, go!
She's supposed to be a cat.
Put it on cat. Maybe the cat likes a cow.
Who goes there?
You're a cat! You're a cat!
You're a cat!
I mean, I'm a cat.
- Meow. - Yeah, right.
Shoo. Go on, get away from here.
My owner does not give scraps to common strays.
Common strays? All right, you asked for it.
- Get the collar! - Gee, that's a nice collar you got on.
- Mind if I have a look? - No! Come no closer!
I must not be so near a creature of the outdoor woods.
- Away with your filth! - My filth?
- My filth?! - Oh, jeepers, here we go.
OK, that's it. I am sick and tired of everybody taking one look at me
and running away 'cause they think I'm filthy.
Well, I got news for you.
I didn't get all primped and preened to have some over-fed, pompous puffball
tell me he's too good for me. I got makeup on my butt, dude!
And you don't even wanna know about the cork!
Stop! No one has ever spoken to me like that!
It is bold. I like it.
Well, believe me, there's more where that came from...
-...puffball. - All right, team, let's boogie.
You are strong. Your essence is overpowering.
- What...? What do you mean by that? - It is your eyes.
- My eyes. - They are luminous.
Luminous? Dang.
You know, I think this is the part where I blacked out.
Did the little shoes and cars actually get into the house?
- So you got a name? - Yes.
It is a Persian name, for I am Persian.
I was born Prince Tigeriess Mahmood Shabaz.
That's a mouthful. Can I just call you Tiger?
- This place is huge. - Wicked cool.
Animals are in the house.
Wow!
- Oh, my goodness. - This is so cool.
- Yes! OK, stations, everybody. - Let's boogie!
- We got it. - Here we go.
No grip, no grip, no grip.
- Hammy! Less claw, more pad. - Oh, OK.
That hurt.
- Just a minute, I'll be right there. - What was that?
It... That's just the sound of my heart. Can't you hear it?
This way, this way!
OK, OK, we're good. Go back to work.
There ya go.
Here, catch!
Oh, boy.
Yes, I'm gonna make it.
My father, he had an exceptionally flat face.
He was so beautiful, he could barely breathe.
Fascinating.
...inside, I have a multi-leveled climby-thing with shag carpet.
- Come, I show you. - No, no!
I haven't told you about my life.
Good, good. Going great, going great.
What is that?
That is what gets the humans out of bed in the morning.
Where'd she go?
Get down and stay down.
Move. Move.
Come on! We've gotta go before she comes back.
- No! Not without those Spuddies. - What?
Lou, Penny, back to the TV. Heather, keep an eye on that human.
- I'm on it, RJ. - No, Heather. Wait!
The tingle, the tingle.
RJ! The wagon's full, let's get out of here.
Vincent, this'll only take a second
- Vincent? - Where?
- Who's Vincent? - Oh, Verne, Vincent.
Simple slip of the bear. Tongue!
Just bear with me is what I meant to say.
There's no bear.
Lights fading. Limbs growing co...
Heather.
Oh, Heather!
There's a dead, white rat on my staircase.
I thought you were dead.
I learned from the best, Dad.
That's my girl.
Come to Papa.
We better hurry. We don't have much time.
- What's going on, RJ? - Nothing!
Let's get out of here because we have what we need.
- No, we don't. - What are you talking about?
- We have more than enough. - Hey, listen.
I've got this long to hand over that wagon of food to a homicidal bear.
If these Spuddies aren't on the menu, then I will be. Now let go of my tail.
What?
Let go!
Hey, whoa!
I'm sorry, I've gotta go.
Stella, Stella, where are you going? Stella!
Stella!
Look, it's not you. It won't work, OK, because I'm a...
Skunk!
Yeah, that. Sorry you have to see this.
Fire in the hole!
- Oh, my... - This smell doesn't bother you?
No. This face was bred for beauty.
I cannot smell a thing.
You can't smell?
To the door! Go, go, go, go, go, go!
- Run! - This way!
Let's party.
Bunnies!
Flee, my love.
Run, that way. Outside!
Move, kids! Come on!
Buenos d¨Şas, reptile.
You've just been verminated.
You stink.
That's because you let them into my... house!
- Those... - Hey, Nancy, stop your honkin'.
These little guys will be disposed of quickly and humanely.
No! Not humanely. As inhumanely as possible.
It was a pleasure doing business with you, ma'am.
- What's he gonna do to us, Mama? - I don't know, baby.
I don't wanna die, Dad. Not for real.
There, there, there, sweetheart. We'll be OK.
You were right about him, Verne.
We shoulda listened. Sorry there.
No.
I knew we couldn't trust him, and I got us into this.
I should've known better.
Wow!
Vincent?
So I was on my way down here to kill you.
But I stopped to watch the show, and I gotta say...
...that, right there,
is a thing of beauty.
That is the most vicious, deceitful,
self-serving thing I've ever seen.
Classic RJ.
You take the food, and they take the fall.
You keep this up, you're gonna end up just like me.
Having everything you ever wanted.
But I already had that.
What, them? Who are you kidding?
You said it yourself, you're a family of one.
Always will be.
It's how guys like you and me survive.
So a few saps got hurt in the process.
Tough. That's life. Trust me, you don't need them.
Actually, I do.
And right now, they really need me.
So I really need this!
RJ!
What the...?
- There goes my back again. - Are you OK?
You sorry sack of rat dung.
Whoa, Stella, this is a rescue. I'm rescuing you.
I'm gonna gas you so hard your grandchildren'll stink.
- Bear! - What's that?
- Bear! - Hair?
- Bear! - Dare?
- Bear! - Oh, bear!
What?
- We're out of control! - We can drive.
- It's just like Auto-Homicide 3! - What?
Verne, let me in! Wrong button! Wrong button!
- Please select destination. - Take us home! Take us to the log!
Previous destination selected. Make a legal U-turn.
We got it!
- Hammy! Let me in! - Not listening to RJ.
Kids, lose that bear!
What weapons do we have?
- We've got a hammer. - Cool.
You little...
Thank you. Yes, yes! Hey!
- Let me in, let me in! - No! Ring-tailed charlatan!
Ozzie!
He's trying to help us. Just let him in.
- After what he did to us? - But he came back.
And he brought a bear.
- No fighting while we're driving. - We will turn this van around, mister.
He started it.
I'm telling you, he's trying to help us.
But, Verne, you're the one who always says trust your tail.
But it's not tingling.
- Why didn't you say so? - Hey!
Thank you, thank you.
- You're dead, RJ! - Duck!
- And your friends are next. - Look out!
Make an immediate left turn.
Bonus points!
Yeah!
RJ!
Yeah!
- Look out. - High score.
No, no, no, no!
You have arrived.
Everybody all right?
- Come on! - We've gotta go, we've gotta go!
The old jazz dance injury.
- Come on, come on. Quillo! - Go, go, go.
- Did we make it? - That was close!
- All right! - Are we here?
Penny? The kids here? Hammy?
Scary clown.
Look out!
A weed hacker, Verne. A weed hacker!
- Hey! - Up, up, go up.
Show your little rat faces. Filthy creatures.
Stay in the woods where you belong.
Watch out!
You guys wanna party, do ya? All right, then, let's party.
- Mom! - Kids!
Penny, Lou, look out! Down!
That's it! Verne, get everybody out of here. I'll distract him.
- Are you crazy? He'll kill you. - Well, I'm the one he wants.
Take care of your family, Verne.
I intend to. The whole family.
- There's got to be something we can do. - There's no time.
Hammy!
Hey, Vincent. You were right.
With a Spuddie, enough just isn't enough.
RJ!
Now, Hammy. Go, go, go!
OK...
I got the cookie.
- That's the... - The Depelter Turbo.
Prepare for a lot of stinging.
Oh, no! No, no! No, no! No!
Ouch!
That stung like I knew it would!
- Yeah! - All right!
Good job, everybody. That's teamwork.
Come here, Hammy, come here. You are a genius, my boy.
Oh, thank you.
And, Verne, don't you ever fix this shell!
Yeah. Glad it's working for ya.
Take it off, give it back.
Here we go, off to the Rockies for you, Smoky.
Now, you do realize that was a Depelter Turbo?
Officer, please. It was that Verminator.
He sold it to me. This has nothing to do with me.
Hey, hey, it was in your yard.
Your name's on the contract, so tell it to the judge.
- No! It's not my fault! Let go of me! - Ma'am...
I can't be arrested! I'm the president of the homeowner's association!
Take her down!
She's getting away!
- We got a twitcher! Watch it! Ma'am! - Get her!
- Stop that! - Can I get help over here?
Somebody get a hold of her legs!
- Play? - Oh, no!
No, no! No, no!
High five, Hammy!
- Yes! - It worked!
We did it!
- Oh, yes! - Stella!
- Over here, Tiger.
Oh, Stella.
So this is the outdoor woods? I like it.
Come on, big boy. You're coming with me.
You know, RJ, just for the record,
if you had told us that all that food you were trying to get
was to pay back an angry bear, we would've given it to you.
- Really? - Yeah, that's what families do.
They look out for each other.
- I've never had anything like that. - I know. But believe me, this...
This is the gateway to the good life.
Wish you would've told me that sooner.
Well, that's bad communication. Also something families do.
So, what do you say? You wanna be a part of it?
Come here, come here. I promised I wouldn't do this. OK.
Welcome to the family!
- Hey! - Group hug!
OK, OK.
What a first week of spring.
Wait a minute! That means there's only 267 days left till winter.
What are we gonna do for food?
Yes, Hammy.
I filled the log.
- Jeepers! - What...?
Look, look! I found my nuts!
That, my friends, is the object of all human attention and devotion.
- And they call it a TV. - Wicked cool!
Humans feel an inner need to connect with the world around them.
That is super-duper.
They also feel a need to sit on their fat butts.
Watching TV fulfills both needs at the same time.
Wow. Interesting.
Come on, kids. Family time there, in front of the TV. Got your snack food?
Buy a vowel. Buy a vowel! Buy a "Y". Please buy a "Y".
- I can't find the remote. - Hey, Spikey, race ya!
- Has anybody seen the remote? - Dad, chill.
I could do a little TV.
Today's the day we find out if the baby is gifted
or if Saxon is really an alien.
Like Khan in Star Trek ll!
The Genesis Project was in the hands of the Enterprise,
but Khan had his plan to steal the invention!
- Well, that was specific. - I saw it on TNT, a retrospective.
- Gummi Worm, anybody? - Let me have one.
Bucky, pass this to Lou.
- Taste this. - Don't you take that.
- This is the perfect food. - Fat-free cookies?
Might as well be eating dirt.
I've had dirt. I don't like dirt. It tastes like dirt.
The show is starting.
Hang on a minute.
I can't wait. I can't wait.
Yes! Here we go.
- Kind of anticlimactic. - Shoot!